Decoding More Dominant Personal Ads

I’ve decoded another personal ad once before.

A friend emailed me a craigslist post recently to give me a heads up of a dominant woman looking for a submissive.

It’s most appreciated of course. I told him that after reading the post, I could tell i was not the submissive for her.

“I am in my mid-twenties, and seeking a partner. I want a best friend, a provider, and a lover all in one person.”

Unless she’s talking about me providing her with canned ham and the occasional beer. My income level wouldn’t allow that.

“I want this man to be a masculine alpha. He should be well-groomed, in-shape, tall, and intellectual. He need not take the world seriously, but be a lover of philosophy. He must be spiritual. He must aim to succeed in his career, but value leisure. He must want to have children.”

Spiritual scares me. I hope she doesn’t mean going to church. Going to church might be a hard limit. The part about my career also makes me thing nothing will ever be good enough for her. As far as wanting children goes….not so much.

“He must be stoic in public, but seek to be overwhelmed by my femininity in private. I want a man who is dominant in public, but submissive in private.”

I have a few posts about this topic in the past. It’s still frustrating to read. Not to mention, I’m hardly stoic.

“I want to be in control in bed most of the time. I want to tell him when we can screw. I want him to beg for it. After I deny sex to him for long enough, I want him to overpower me. “

So let me see if I understand this. She’s going to deny me until I overpower her? Why don’t I just overpower her every night since that seems to be the only way I’ll ever have sex? What if my idea of “long enough” is one day, while her idea is one month?

I sound cranky….I know.

Yeah…I still sent her an email.